Wednesday, January 9, 2013

New Year

My only resolution for 2013 is to have a good year.

2012 is now designated as memory and I'm looking forward to the changes and adaptions that 2013 will bring to me and my family.

I have to confess, I am surprised I survived 2012 since it had such an incredibly chaotic beginning- mixed with negative and positive life changes from the very get go. I've learned to let go of a lot of the family politics I was struggling with, all though it took me up until the end of the summer to do so! I also learned I need to make the choices in life that are good for me- if they are healthy for me, they either are, or will be, healthy for the family and friends they impact.

That being said, some major highlights of this last year include the various stages of wedding planning I went through- from shrugging it off, to over planning, to coming to grips with the reality that I do not want nor do I need a white washed wedding staged to the standards of modern society. Yep, we still want our special day and we still want our loved ones to be there and for it to be beautiful, but not at the expence of our sanity, contentment or wallets! After all, isn't the reason you have a ceremony and reception so that you can invite your loved ones to participate and encourage you in your commitment to your partner (and for many to their spiritual head- I fall into this category but not all do :) ).

I feel like many of the people and relationships I was apart of have dulled. They have not ended, but I feel a strong disconnect to many people. This is not a negative- I know that I can still turn to them regardless of distance when I need, and it's nice to do that every once and again but sometimes distance can also sweeten those moments of catch up. It is also a sign that I do need to let go and move one. This summer I was supposed to move but it was met with many negative remarks and very little help or support from many of the most important people in my life. We - together as a couple - have a plan now, and one that is being held in denial by most people but that still is recieving support.

Move to northern BC where he has a cousin that will help us in establishing ourselves there. From what we've researched and been told, there are plenty of opportunities. Fingers crossed. Even if there isn't, it can't be worse than where we are and we can guarantee we will both be able to find work there anyways, if not in the fields we are hoping. When we go, we are leaving enough cash behind in an account here for emergency tickets home. This is important to me incase something happens- an emergency in one of our families, or out there something bad happens and we need to come home.

Hopefully this is the plan we will see come true this year, but if not, then next. It will happen,  but hopefully it happens quickly now that we have a place firmly in mind and committed to. If we leave when planned, we will be returning home, taking a week or two in May to be home. This is important because a friend and I are planning a masquerade for Thursday May 23rd. (Keep that day open my friends for it! ) among other events. I suspect we will be bussing for this, so I am expecting we will be home for a week, but on the move for two. If, somehow, we have managed to get all our bills paid and have enough in savings for the flights, then hopefully we will be able to take that option.


  1. Why do you both not make plans here around your family and friends who all Love you, jobs can be found here and moving forward to reap your rewards with positive outlook , Love Uncle Jerry

  2. Hey uncle Jerry, no there aren't the kind of jobs available here that we can get there, and I don't want to make plans around my family and have almost no friends left living in Ontario at all, and the ones that are here are planning on leaving ASAP as well. Unfortunately I don't feel comfortable in Collingwood, and it has been made increasingly clear by family as well, that should I move anywhere outside of CWood I won't be welcome to be a part of their lives anymore. They also have far too many judgements on me and my life and relationship- and vice versa for him as well. My sole goal for as long as I can remember has been get as far away from home as I possibly can.

  3. Kyla I hate to think that ANY of your family has told you that you wouldn't be welcome to be part of there lives anymore. I understand growing up and making decisions for yourself but I hope you consider how hard it is to be that far away from family who does love you and only wants the best for you. Love you, Aunt Debbie